
I keep my promises. Here is the  first installment of the 
Bacon  Watch.
 Some weirdos got together and made a  ship out of bacon and other meat products:
 http://www.slashfood.com/2008/01/27/meat-ship-sailing-on-a-sea-of-blue-pork/
 Another weirdo wrote an entire poem  about bacon (I am still suspicious that Sung wrote this  himself):
I’ve  gripped with trembling fingers luscious pork
The golden, tender flesh of  long-banned swine
Reflecting all the while upon the law
Forbidding me from  chewing on this fat.
What hateful ancient dictum could declare
A fatwa on  this salty meat so crisp?
 Myself, I’d  best try making my thoughts crisp,
With clarity proclaiming love of  pork
And with my greasy lips proudly declare
My gratitude to tasty  slaughtered swine
For offering so selflessly its fat
and savory self –  there oughta be a law!
 Well, so  there is. But I’ll defy that law
And any that would bar me from this  crisp
Deliciousness, bestreaked with tender fat.
Jehovah would not  quarantine the pork,
Brave product of the noble trotting swine.
And this  I’ll toward bright heaven now declare! 
 
And as  I scan the buffet, too, declare
That flavor is its own unbending law.
And  so atop the pantheon go swine,
Their pinkly marbled pieces done up  crisp;
A true apotheosis of the pork,
Illuminated manuscripts of  fat.
 All days,  not just one Tuesday, should be fat,
We pleasure-loving creatures now  declare,
With Mardi Gras beads fashioned out of pork!
For chewy, crunchy  lust is now my law,
And never was a morning ever crisp
That lacked a  heaping helping of the swine.
 I’ll slap  the face of any human swine
Who asks me if I want to chew the fat
But  fails to serve me anything that’s crisp —
Then runs to his accountant, to  declare
Deductions, loss and income, per the law,
Of which old Caesar  makes his barreled pork.
 Such  metaphors do insult to this pork.
Let us instead heap blessings on the  swine!
Speak not to me of the Mosaic law;
All renderings are useless, but  for fat.
Let skillets, with their cracklings, declare
Your ban on trayf  has been burned to a crisp. 
 O noble  fat! O skillet’s sizzling law!
Declare me but an acolyte of swine.
Crisp  logic fails — all falls in thrall to pork.